Supporting Martha

I just wanted to say that I've bought my first copy of Martha Stewart Weddings because I had money to burn, and I need ideas for flowers and because I need to support Martha's various wedding related enterprises:

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That's all I wanted to say this time.

Wedding dress disaster (literally)

Ages ago (well, who am I kidding, I do it all the time) I used to search through the internet looking for funny things, and ages ago I also loved the movie Titanic, so one day I found this funny website called etiquettehell.com, which I can't access anymore, but the story I want has moved to another website: KissTheBride.com.au - where it can be found here in its entirety:

Titanic Wedding Disaster

But in a nutshell, the bride wanted her bridesmaids to wear dresses like Rose Dewitt Bukater (Kate Winslet) does in Titanic and her mother-in-law said she'd make them. The dresses looked like this:

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except she wanted them with a blue underskirt (not coral). After a while, the mother of the bride realised that it was a month before the wedding and the mother-in-law hadn't done anything towards making the dresses.
The on the wedding day with the bridesmaids, junior bridesmaid and flowergirls waiting at the church for the dresses to arrive. Apparently they did arrive, shortly before the wedding ceremony was due to start. This is what they looked like:

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Isn't it beautiful?

Dress drama

Check me out! I'm blogging from my iPhone. Only took me four years to realise there was an app to use Blogger and I didn't have to do it via Safari. I'm so clever!
*cough* hmmm.
Was half-listening to the news tonight and heard something about a wedding gown shop going into liquidation and hundreds of brides being thrown into limbo.
And guess what?
The shop was one of the shops I went to, to try on wedding gowns. I actually tried on three but none fit and made my ladies (my boobs FYI) look flat. And they are anything but flat because at the time my bub was still booby-fed and well, yeah. They were definitely not flat. And because I was so cut that I had to try on size 54 wedding gowns, I decided trying on wedding gowns was not my favourite thing to do and refused to try on another for six months.
And to think, had the assistant pandered to my ego (which I thought they were MEANT to do), I could have been in the same boat as these brides who are FREAKING out that they have no dress to wear to their weddings.

Reality TV Wedding Goodness

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Have found the most hilarious new* TV show called Four Weddings that I watched for the first time the other night. First The Man was watching it and asked me what it was about and then I sat down and had a squiz so I could explain what was happening and now today I am frantically googling it to see what there is to know about it.
It's hilarious! All these brides who are probably lovely in the real world are snipy and horrible to each other and they criticise EVERYTHING, like one bride had her wedding in the police chapel and one of the other brides said the chapel was a bit boring (or something like that - it was not a resounding pat on the back for the bride's choice of applause for the wedding ceremony venue anyway).
Here is a picture of the boring police academy chapel. Totally average as I'm sure you'll agree. And then elsewhere in the show, one of the brides ordered scallops at the reception even though she didn't really like them and then begrudgingly admitted that they were really good.

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And way back when me and my non-engaged friends were young(er) and well before my bub was ever thought of and before I'd ever even met The Man, I used to go to my friend's place and watch Bridezillas and we'd laugh at the craaazy people on there. I have so many favourites, and again I am sure these ladies (and sometimes men) are perfectly normal, sane, rational people, but TV editing does not do them any favours. There was the chick who made about 20 cakes as centrepieces for the tables at her reception and then thy; the whiny chick from Texas who didn't like her fiance's haircut, the woman who had about 20 bridesmaids and had her wedding in a castle and who was being a princess in all definitions of the word, the man who wanted everyone to be ferried to the wedding in golfcarts for free and the wedding reception people said no. And the money they'd spend. ABSOLUTELY CRIMINAL - 'oh, my budget was $80,000 but I've gone over and now it's $110,000'. What? Where do you get that much money to spend? Where do I go to get this money? Anyway, now that friend is an old married woman and I am an old un-married woman with a baby, and so those days of Bridezilla marathons are long gone. Plus I don't have AusStar so I don't get those good TV shows.



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And the other wedding TV show that I used to love, that I also used to watch with my married lady friend on her AusStar was Engaged and Underage. This one was fascinating firstly because all the people on the show were at least 8 years younger than me and had boyfriends/girlfriends and in some cases babies. Also because it was Bridezillas with children! So much more scope for tantrum-throwing. I used to stream this on my laptop because it was so fascinating to watch. I used to pretend my zipcode was 90210. It was a fantastic show to watch because of the couples seemed so mature and other couples were... um... less so. What I DO remember from this show is that one of the couples started their own non-profit organisation To Write Love On Her Arms which I thought was pretty cool.


*Well, it's new for me at least

Cake Horror

I am petrified that my wedding will end up 'lame'. It will almost be a destination wedding, because the people from my adopted hometown who think driving 20 minutes is ridiculous won't love travelling TO ANOTHER TOWN! And the people from my actual hometown who actually are travelling 90 minutes or more just to see me and the man prance around in fancy clothes,
One of my biggest wedding related fears comes from one of my favourite blogs, Cake Wrecks. The terrible terrible cakes that appear on this blog make me realise that these cakes could happen to me. And oh, God, if I was appalled at the slap-dash effort put into icing my bub's birthday cake, I will be horrified by a wedding cake that's anything less than awesome.
And while all the Cake Wrecks were enough to strike horror into my heart, this one totally freaked me out because the person who made it hd totally no contact with the people who ordered it, then it turned up as you can see, right before the reception, also it tasted awful.
Fail. Fail. Fail!
I don't know what kind of cake we are getting, but I know it has to be awesome. I will not settle for second best.
I know, I KNOW I am a Bridezilla in the making, but at least I am up front about it.
And to further entertain you, here is a link to Wrecky Wedding Week over at Cake Wrecks. It's from last year but the horror and bad-cakemanship lives on. Specially for the people who paid good money to have these cakes made.
*Shudders*